Mary Ann Wilson

Dear Kris,

My ex-boyfriend just moved back into town, and I’ve been spending most of my time with him. My old feelings for him are coming back, and he’s mentioned that he wants me to date him again. The problem is that I have a boyfriend that I love very much, and I don’t want to leave him. At the same time, I can’t ignore my feelings for my ex. What should I do?

Jen

Dear Jen,

I’m not going to sugarcoat this for you: proverbially speaking, you seem to selfishly want to have your cake and eat it, too. Sorry, but you just can’t have both.

Hot Docs Canadian International Documentary Festival is North America's largest documentary festival. Each year, the festival presents a selection of more than 100 cutting-edge documentaries from Canada and around the globe. Through its industry programmes, the Festival also provides a full range of professional development, marketing, and networking opportunities for documentary professionals. Below are the remaining (April 23-27)show times and locations for documentaries related to love and relationships. Happy viewing!

Dear Kris,
The man I’m dating gives me a lot of love and attention, and shows how into our relationship he is. But he is only like this when we’re alone. As soon as we’re in public, especially around his friends, he acts like a jerk and even introduces me as a “friend”.
What am I supposed to do about it?
-Pissed Off

Dear Kris,

I'm tired of being single, but I don't know what to do about it. I'm painfully shy, unattractive, and not interesting enough. Men don't ever approach me at bars or anywhere else. What do I have to do to get noticed?

Jenn

Oh, Jenn.

You sound a hell of a lot like I used to. The old "I'm not pretty enough or interesting enough" syndrome. I know it's not fun, but it's also a bit of a cop-out. It's really easy to sit in a corner and sigh about how you're alone, when every other woman can find someone. But maybe instead you should observe these ladies. Take note.

Rating: 4/4 Flags

Wending down Pape, in the ever more Queer-Positive portion of the city known as the Danforth, I was delighted to find François Coiffure & Spa, a Queer-Positive hair salon that made me feel luxurious just standing in the waiting area while I booked my appointment. I relaxed in the burgundy, high-backed leather chairs, sipped some tea, and had cookie from Athena's, the Queer-Friendly bakery next door. The warm patch of sun was welcome and inviting on a bright but chilly spring day, and the whole salon seemed to glow with a proud luster. Brian, François's charming partner, and I passed the time chatting, and it became clear that this was not just a place to get your hair cut; this was a place with a touch of elegance that made it worthy of the name "Coiffure."

The interior burgundy walls are set off by large gilded-framed portraits, the most prominent of which is Marie Antoinette. The salon has a very generous space for hairstyling as well as a spa at the back for waxing, esthetics, facials, and other body treatments. François also offers Spa Day packages: the Morning or Afternoon Delight caught my eye, with a one-hour facial, manicure, and pedicure for only $115.00. Looking up and down at the exposed brick walls and the beautiful antique furniture, and listening to the wall fountain trickling, I knew it would not be a chore to spend some time here. The relaxing, luxurious atmosphere made it easy to feel like I was really taking time for myself. And yet, for those with a little less hair, or the desire for a little less hair, François's also offers a basic buzz cut for $20.

On a typical night out with the friends, discussions of relationships usually tend to spark hot debates and feed our gossip cravings. The individuals in relationships usually butter-up their partners with flattery and admiration, while the singles drift off into fantasy worlds, wondering where their princes/princesses are hiding, in what bar s/he may be loitering. Romantic relationships hold little importance in my life, but I suppose the scale weighs differently for others. Which brings me to a seemingly endless series of questions: Why must our lives always revolve around entangling ourselves with the complexities of the dating game, with marriage still that game’s elusive prize? Am I seriously running out of time to find a spouse, or are others rushing into marriage? How about if I do not manage to find someone because my life is too occupied by other concerns- are my priorities misplaced? How about if I fall out of love before my hubby-to-be and I decide to tie the knot? Do I then have to start back at square one, lurking until my next partnership prey comes along? Does true love even exist in the first place, and if so, is marriage its ultimate expression?

Editor’s note: Love In Toronto welcomes Kristen Goetz to the team! Read on for an introductory peak at our new writer and her new column.

Dating. The mere mention of that simple word has the ability to make a person smile, yearn, or hyperventilate. While everyone wants a special person in his or her life, one thing is certain: dating isn’t easy. When a situation has you confused and seeking Yoda-like relationship wisdom, who do you turn to? Friends, usually. Family members, in desperate times. But some circumstances require an outside source, an unbiased stranger who can dole out straightforward guidance without worrying about your sensitive ego.

2007 witnessed an almost uncanny growth in the wedding industry. According to a recent study by Dr. Joe Goldblatt, CSEP (Certified Special Events Professional), last year some $186 billion was spent on nuptial celebrations. "The marketplace today is big enough to sustain and support your endeavour," he says. Dr. Goldblatt, who is also the founder of the ISES (International Special Events Society), believes that "if you're [working in the] wedding events area, expansion and diversification possibilities are tremendous. If you are comfortable enough as a wedding planner, you will easily adapt to any other event coordination environment, especially corporate parties." Conversely, "if you're just entering the market of wedding organizing, the supply/demand situation has never been more favourable. Even a small fish in this big pond can get decent orders."